Crowning Glory

To Cut or Not to Cut...

Now that I have the dress for my high school reunion, I made an appointment to get my hair cut.

I've been going to the same woman since I moved out here, and after all these years she's become a friend, as well as being amazing with hair. She did Daughter #1's hair for her junior prom, and Daughter #2's for her eighth grade graduation last year, and they looked like they should be in a full page spread in Vogue.

Not that I'm going to let her do much. I wear my hair long. I'm sure many people (yes, I mean you, Mom) think 47 is too old to wear your hair down your back. But I like it this way.

I've always liked my reddish hair, the texture and the color. I got a lot of attention for it as a kid. I still don't have any gray, but the blond highlights have gotten lighter and lighter the past couple of years, and I'm wondering if they may just eventually turn from blond to white.

I've cut my hair pixie short exactly three times in my life, at 6, 13, and 37. Each time, even at 6, I was looking for a big change, and each time I hated it. At 13 I went to school wearing a hooded sweatshirt, trying to hide it.

"What happened to your beautiful red hair!" my English teacher moaned. And I wanted to cry. I told everyone I needed it short to be on my swim team, which was a bold-faced lie.

That trauma kept me from cutting it short for almost 25 years. But after my marriage ended I wanted to change everything. Native Americans used to chop their hair off as an act of mourning, and sometimes I think that's what I was doing: mourning.

Other times I think I might have been hiding. A woman's hair can be a very sensual thing. I mean, what's the deal with men and long hair anyway? I've seen men turn their heads at women that are seriously not attractive, just because of the hair. I look back at when my marriage ended, and it's easy to see why I may have wanted to hide.

A couple of years ago my hair had grown really long, pretty much the way it is now. Again, I was looking for a change, but I wasn't going to chop it all off. Instead, I had it cut to just above my shoulders. It was dramatically different, sure, but I was totally not prepared for the way the men in my life, from my friends to my ex, responded.

"You cut your hair." They practically whined, seeming to be in mourning themselves.

I felt as though I'd had my breasts removed. I couldn't believe this connection men have between hair and sexuality, or even attractiveness. Come on guys, it's only hair! Has anyone else ever had a similar experience?

I know plenty of women that look stunning with shorter hair. But apparently, I am not one of them. Luckily, that suits me.

This time I'm only going in for a decent trim. Nothing drastic. Clearly, I don't think I could handle it.

Comments

[LPC]

Just wait until you have old lady hair. It starts acting really oddly when it's long. You might want to hold off on the cut.

[Jill]

Your hair is beautiful...back away from the scissors, sista!

I have a friend who has shoulder length blonde hair. Her hair stylist must have had a stroke, because her trim turned into an above the ear bob. I was over for dinner and her husband was not happy with the cut. He pointed out my hair and told her that I was what women were supposed to look like...I was so embarrassed, but also a little pleased. Don't tell her!

[Pseudo]

Our mothers' generation thought middle aged women too old to have long hair. I think that was weird. Many of my girlfriends have kept their hair long and it looks amazing. My hair does not grow well and stops a few inches past my shoulders. I've always wished it would grow doen my back.

[GiGi @ Incrementum]

I think long hair is gorgeous on all ages! Especially if that's how you like it. I've had long hair forever, and only recently took some off.

I say, if you want a change maybe cut some LONG layers for a small change or look. This way you wont lose your length which you love AND you'll add a little spunk to it.

I hope that helped!
Thanks for the phone luck...

[Jan]

I agree - your hair is beautiful!

I used to have very long, very thick, very lovely hair. Alas, since I've moved to Ohio I seem to be shriveling up like a prune, it's so damn *dry* here. My hair is suffering too, so I cut it just a little shorter than shoulder length after my first winter up here. It was either that or look like a 5-foot-tall Troll Doll (you think I'm kidding, but I'm not). Beloved hates it, but he's not the one who has to take care of it, now is he?

Fortunately, my hair has a lot of natural curl, so it looks cute without much effort. The gray that is coming in is another matter all together, however. *sigh*

[Midlife Mama]

I dunno, but men have a thing for long hair and they all whine if you cut it off. Sheesh. But you are lucky to have no gray! I've been hiding my gray for years. And people tell me I look 10 years younger than I do. So either my hairstylist is paying them to say that so I'll keep coloring or it really does. Either way, I keep on ponying up the bucks every three or four months! You are lucky to have long beautiful hair. :)

[Mama Badger]

Glad to hear you're keeping the long hair. I was worried for a second when I read the title bar.

Yeah, what is it with guys and long hair? PB is all about me growing my hair long. After this summer, I'm going to go for it again. I'm one of those fickle hair people, though. Long one year, short the next.

As for grey. What grey? Lady Clairol and I have no idea what you're talking about (you lucky duck...)

[Jersey Girl]

I wear my hair kind of shaggy and I've had bangs since the day I was born and I'm very anal about them. NO ONE is allowed to cut them, but me.
When it comes to gray, I know I have some, but it's been years since I've seen the color of my "natural" hair.

[Sprite's Keeper]

I keep wanting to cut my hair short, but the only thing stopping me is the possibility of it not working at all and then it would take months to get it back to normal. So, I go in with bold intentions and chicken out every time.