Real Housewives of the Vineyard?

 

Don't Judge A Book

A small group of field hockey moms were huddled on the chilly metal bleachers recently, watching the season home-opener.

Now, I don't know these women well. But our daughters have been together in school since they were little. Over the years we've commiserated on soccer fields and in school auditoriums, about everything from teachers and sleepovers to adolescent attitude.

Last season our girls were the new freshmen on the field hockey team. We sat through games, perplexed at the ref's never-ending whistle-blowing, trying to figure out what the hell was going on. A couple of us, myself included, even played the game (briefly) back in the day, and we still couldn't figure out half the calls.

Our banter became sort of a joke. And this year we fell right back into it, trading horror stories about our daughters' belligerence, joking about the game as we tried to figure out the ref's calls, and loudly cheering the Vineyard team.

At first we didn't pay any attention to the lineup of four moms a few rows down from us. We could tell by their cheering that they were from the off-island team.  After a while though, I started to notice them sneaking glances back at us and then looking at one another meaningfully as we giggled.

At one point they turned around and set us straight regarding the foul we were wondering about out loud. We thanked them politely.

Okay, I admit it, we were being silly. But we weren't hurting anybody; we weren't being "mean girls." It was simple fun, damn it.

The women stood to go shortly before the game ended (2-0 Vineyard, BTW). We assumed they had a boat to catch to get off-island and home at a reasonable hour.

"Did you see the way they checked us out?" one of the Vineyard moms remarked when they'd left. "Talk about judgmental."

"Oh my gosh." It suddenly dawned on me. "They think we're The Real Housewives of Martha's Vineyard!"

We all laughed when I said it, but we shared the distinct impression it was probably true.

They had some preconceived notion about what women that live in a place like Martha's Vineyard must be like. And based on our shallow bleacher-behavior they'd no doubt decided we fit the bill.

If only they knew...

But they didn't, and that's really the point, isn't it?

I would've liked to tell them I'm originally from New Jersey and see what they'd think then. I have it on good authority from friends who follow the show, that those are the women they'd really need to watch out for.

Go Vineyard.

Comments

[LPC]

Just goes to show you. The term, "off-island", is quite a good metaphor for many conditions.

[Jan]

This "Real Housewives" thing kind of irritates me - Beloved and I have a far better word for women like that: Werepoodles. Pooties for short. (It's a long story and one I'm sure I'll never tell on the internet, in the interest of maintaining a good relationship with my step-daughters.)

Maureen, you aren't anywhere NEAR being a Pootie. Trust me on this.

[lizspin]

I'm still amazed that other schools actually take boats over to the island to play field hockey. . . but - then again - I'm from New Jersey. . . don't expect much . .

[Nancy McDonnell]

I think if for the next game you wore that drop dead gorgeous dress you wore to the reunion, THEN you might be one of the "real" housewives.
:-)

[Mama Badger]

I always wondered how those, what, 10 women, represented whole states. Or cities. Especially the ones from Atlanta. I know a lot of "housewives" from Atlanta who are nothing like those women.

Yeah, I'm pretty sure you guys wouldn't fit the "housewives" of TV description. First of all, you were sitting at your kids sports game.

ps- I played field hockey, too, and even on the field we had no idea what half the calls were!

[Mama Badger]

I have to add, woo hoo, Blogger finally let me post a comment! I've been trying to for days with no success...

[Kimberly]

Yah, the RH of New Jersey would kick the Island's butt. They were tough. :)

[Ocean Girl]

You are so cute Maureen. I like when you say you're from Jersey; sounds like you're the girl for Flushing I know :)

[Erin]

That whole housewife phenomenon on TV is too much. I often wonder what that is doing for our reputation internationally...

Insightful post, Maureen!
:-)

[Casey]

There are a group of snooty women like that whenever I take my kids to swim class. We go in the morning and it's always me and them and I feel so inadequate. Not really since I'm totally cooler than them but they're annoying.

[Kathryn]

I think they were very insecure...not being on their home turf. And they were obviously envious of your home base. Their problem...