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June 07, 2010

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My husband is one of those "don't make a mark on concrete" guys. We had our sidewalks done when we first moved here, and it drove me nuts not putting our initials and Js handprint. But four years later, when I see initials in other walks and point out that it could have been ours, he conveniently forgets that he's the one that put the kibosh on it, and apologizes profusely.

THere are times when I find myself shoving back into the corners the "my mom" in me too. It's kind of liberating, isn't it?

(I haven't posted yesterday's photo, yet. I took one while I was cleaning my spice racks. It's scintillating...no "scent"illating. HAHAHAHAAHA!!!!(ahem) But one thing led to another which led to falling asleep while reading stories, and, well...I'll go post it in a few.)

Love it! The corner foundation of my MIL's house has her and her later husbands initials that he put in when they built it. When my husband put in a back stoop, he put the dog's footprint and name!

We are having our driveway repaired this month (one of those fun expensive expenses that doesn't even improve the value of the home, just keeps it from deteriorating) and I want to initial it. I suspect my fussy husband, who, although cluttered still likes things pristine (i.e., his many unopened since we moved into the house two years ago boxes are all stacked neatly), will be horrified at the idea.

And yes. He just walked into the kitchen and I asked him. "Why would you want to do THAT?!" he asked.

Such a neat little mark, just initials and not even a full date. She's a good girl.

(Maureen, you could have let her scribble her heart :))

"that place of eternal control where we are doomed to failure." Perfect. That's what you can write in the concrete next time:). As in "Do not live in..."

I love her mark. Where's YOUR'S? :-)

Good for you for shaking off your mother's "nut gene". When they put in a new sewer pipe in front of our house I let Jude put in his handprint/name and date. It's cute. But then some random strangers who just happened to walk by decided to write E.W. + D.M. right next to it. Totally ruined it.

Good for you for letting go. And indeed you should leave your mark. I did when we poured our tennis court. Wonder if my initials are still in that court.

Your daughter's stamp gives it class. Like a 14 Karat gold marking!

I am so proud. My mom was like yours only she did go in for small intitals...mine and my kids initials and shoe prints are down @ the old house, up town...wherever we could find a bit of fresh cement...

I'm so glad you let her do this. There is another home, about a mile away, with my children's little hand prints in the concrete drive in the back. I love knowing it's there, even though we aren't any longer.

Good for you! I'm so glad you let her do that. You def won't regret it!

Oh I love this so much. I'm so glad you let her do it.
There is a shamrock etched into a sidewalk slab in my neighborhood and it's so cool.
Great post!!

My grandmother's and uncle's house in the San Fernando Valley had my baby footprints in the cement by the garage. My uncle had just set the cement, and the story goes that I liked right up and stood in the middle. He picked me up and rushed off to wash my baby feet, and when he came back my footprints were set.

I admire your self-control with this, and in the end, you're not only proving you're not what drove you mad with your parental unit, but you kept yourself from going crazy too. It's hard to do. I feel myself slipping sometimes into giving into the chaos, knowing full well that it will bother me more in the long-run...but I trade it for an immediate temper tantrum in which I can release my frustration!

I'm so proud of you for being able to push past all that you knew as a child. Too many ppl use their role models as children to excuse why they repeated the very behavior that made them miserable....

Kudos to you for handing her that stick! She's lucky to have you, sweetie!

I have my daughter and oldest son's footprints (and date) in the cement of our side walkway. My youngest wasn't even born yet. I treasure those little footprints everytime I see them. If we ever move I will have to chisel them out of the cement and take them with me.

It's like a little piece of history, Maureen! Like a time capsule. I remember when I was a kid and the sidewalks down my street in Chicago were newly paved, what glorious joy that a few were able to make a mark. Does it drive the cement guys nuts? :)

For many years I worked as a landscape designer and I think I got more commissions from handing a six-inch nail to the clients kids than from brilliant planting schemes.

There certainly are far worse ways to leave your mark! I did the same in middle school when we put in our pool.

Good for you! I've always wanted to do that! I'm proud of you for ignoring your mother's voice in your mind and letting her make her mark.

Knowing me, I'd not only have let her put her initials in it, we'd've had full-fledged (but tasteful) graffiti over every inch of the surface. I've always looked at *everything* as a blank canvas - it's just the way my brain works.

No, Beloved won't let me near projects like this - why do you ask?

Great for you stepping out of that smooth cement box

It must have felt awesome huh?

(-:

I'm with you. I would have let go just a little bit. When we were kids, my Dad wouldn't let us put our marks into the cement. My Mom did find us a little corner that he wouldn't see, though, and put our initials there. I took PB to see it when I showed him my home town!

I love it! And you should be proud of yourself! So beautifully written, too. I was drawn right in. When we built our house and they poured the sidewalk I wanted to leave "our mark" too. But my husband is like your mother - and he won. Drats!

Way to go! Way to not let your mom stop you from doing something fun and memorable with your daughter. My problem is not my mom, but my mother in law. I feel in constant rebellion from her, and my husband does so even more.

Life is meant to be lived...LIVE in capital letters with all of it's messiness and laughter. In the end, you will have lived better than your Mother.

I've embraced Wabi Sabi
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wabi-sabi

Funny enough...it was a client's 13 year old daughter who introduced me to this Japanese idea of imperfection.

I so struggle with being a control freak. I'm a lot better than I was- living on the ranch has helped; and so is Zach. I can let more things just "go" now than I could before. But having a messy house, or kids that refuse their bedrooms for my living room floor and don't clean up the pillows and blankets just irk me, still. I don't like laundry out in my living room, and I like things to look like they just came out of a better homes and garden magazine. Completely unreasonable when we are here only long enough to make a mess; or when there's 2 teenage girls in the house (like now). I have to do a LOT of deep breathing!

What a beautiful story, and what a gift you gave your daughter. You've come a long way, Baby. You are not your mother...indeed.

I love it! Good for you resisting the temptation to be like your mother. ;)

My dad was like that - any cement he poured us kids were jonesin' to put our marks in them, but we were denied each time. When my hubby extended our brick patio with a brick 'pad' over our stone hand-dug well (that was covered with loose cement slabs when we moved in for 'safety') and installed an antique water pump to still access the water in the well (but keep Princess Nagger from falling in), the cement around the base not only has the Nagger's hand imprint, but both mine and my hubby's as well. Since PN was only 1 at the time, it's been fun 6 years later to watch her do 'comparisons' to the prints in the cement. :)

Speaking of moms and septic systems...about 2 months before my older son's bar mitzvah, my mother suggested we have the septic system cleaned so the toilets could handle the "load" at our home celebration. The woman must be prescient. After many attempts to dig up the front yard (a mini-excavator was needed) and find the access to the septic system, we finally discovered the whole thing was about to "blow." The yard looked like a minefield after all this, but disaster was averted.

Your daughter had a good case. I think both of your should have put your hand prints in it. I never think of doing this. Your mom really paid kids to watch the sidewalk dry? - might have been the easiest job they ever got.

hahha.... that's funny Maureen. Of course, being me... ..I can immediately see you... standing there.... probably "stick straight" yourself... with a certain decorum, propriety and dignity about it all ... .... handing over a tiny twig for her to do the deed.....lol..... almost like the passing of a symbolic torch.... good for you.!

I love it! Congrats for handing over the stick. I remember my father putting my hand in wet concrete at the Pensacola Naval Air Station Museum when I was very little. My husband, on the other hand, got his ass paddled for chasing a line of ants down a newly cured sidewalk with an oil can.

It's small; it's discreet; it makes a statement ... sort of like her nose ring?? =>

Yes. Good good good. You know, chances are it might have happened even if you hadn't handed over the stick. But now it's a memory shared instead of a MARK.

Good for you! This is the kind of thing your daughter will remember for years. And memories like that are way better than perfect cement (which will likely get cracked somewhere down the line, anyway)

I'm glad you let her do it. There IS something so cool about fresh cement. We redid our pool coping a few weeks back and the guy caught me messing with the cement and scolded me. I remember writing something vulgar about a neighborhood kid that picked on me once in fresh cement and the last time I checked, it was still there. Oops.

I think that's great. And you just know that you'll love that cement more now than if it were completely unmarked.

So cool! When we was living in the old place, the bridge had to be redone. Everybody living in the cove put their initials and the children put their foot and hand prints. Yup it is still there today. Some of those folks have already passed on, but their mark will be there till the bridge needs to be done again. I think that is soo cool.

We are talking about putting in a concrete driveway and I am going to corner off a section just for the grandkids.

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