IslandRoar

Life After Yes!!

Aidan Donnelley Rowley is one of us. I discovered her blog Ivy League Insecurities late last fall and was immediately drawn in by the artful way she spins her words.

She is a wife, a mother of two little girls, a blogger, and a lawyer who left her job to write. Gutsy? Daring? You bet.

On May 18th, her very first novel, Life After Yes, hit the bookstands. Aidan and her publisher were kind enough to make some copies available pre-publication and I got to read it last week.

Like her blog, it did not disappoint.

Life After Yes is the story of Quinn O'Malley, aka Prudence, a young lawyer who's just gotten engaged to Sage, the guy of her dreams. The setting is Manhattan only months after 911, and Quinn's dad was among the many who died in the Towers that day.

From the moment she gets engaged Quinn starts to question everything about her life and the direction in which it's headed, tumbling, she fears, beyond her control.

The novels characters are sincere, three dimensional. Aidan's use of language weaves a hypnotic spell with passages like this:

And I stare at that ring. Study it. And my mind takes a delirious, poetic detour. If only there were relationship cleaners like there are ring cleaners. If only you could take a good relationship, one that is in fact quite beautiful and robust, but dulled in spots (because of a lost brother or father, or a meddling mother) and just drop it in and wait. And then it would come out glittering and new. Because real life tarnishes even the most stunning gems. If only.

Will Quinn marry Sage or reunite with her old flame Phelps? Will she continue her climb up the corporate legal ladder or walk away? Can she get over losing her dad and find true happiness? Does that even exist?

I loved Quinn, with her many imperfections and her self absorbed angst, and I loved Life After Yes. I was sad when I read the last page because I didn't want it to end. Way to go Aidan! And thank you for the early peek.

I've never done a giveaway here on IslandRoar. But Life After Yes is too good to keep to myself. So leave a comment between now and Monday, and on Monday night I'll do a random drawing. The winner will receive my copy of Life After Yes.

If it isn't you, I highly recommend you order or go buy a copy for yourself. I know I'll definitely be buying another. Daughter #1 is waiting rather impatiently to read it. But I think she's going to have to get in line.

 

Passing It On

I will still be in sunny Florida when you read this. At least, it better be sunny or I will be one cranky cupcake when I return this weekend.

Several of my blogging buddies have given me marvelous awards the last few weeks. I'd like to beg your indulgence while I take this opportunity to say thank you and give them a shout-out.

I got this Beautiful Blogger award from Peggy at Square Peg in a Round Hole. I found Peggy because she's SuziCate's sister, but I keep coming back for her wonderful stories and her obvious warmth. If you haven't  been over there yet, now's the time.

 

I'm supposed to state 7 things about myself before passing this on to up to 15 bloggers. Clearly you already know pretty much all there is to know about me, but I'll give it a try.

• I discovered I was a writer at 8 and never looked back.
• I have the habit of combining 2 or more beauty products at a time (scent, blush, etc) to make the perfect personal combination.
• When I was young I wanted 8 children. For about 5 minutes.

I would like to pass this award on to Michelle at Musings of a Midlife Mama and Other Stories. She is a very recent discovery and I adore her way with words. You need to add her to your reader. Now.

 

 

The Blogger Buddy Award was given to me by SuziCate of The Water Witch's Daughter. SuziCate writes about many things, all of them with an open mind and a poet's heart. I certainly hope you know her by now!

 

I'm going to pass this award along to Erica at Pines Lake Redhead. She lives in Florida now, but she grew up in my  home state of New Jersey, and she's a fellow ginger. As well as my newly adopted little sister. Go tell her I said hi.

 

 

I got this Happy Blog Award from Poindexter at Diary Of A Technophobe. I am so happy to have found her blog. Her observations and reflections are honest and straightforward. I often find myself leaving her site with an innate sense of peace.

I am supposed to list up to 10 things that make me happy. I'll start with these:

• My cats
• Sunny weather
• Seeing the ocean
• Good conversation
• Friends, real life and virtual

I pass this onto a new friend, also from New England, Corinne of Trains, Tutus and Tea time. Corinne writes about motherhood and life and I soak up every word. Believe me, you need to check her out.

 

 

Peggy also gifted me with this Circle of Friends Award as well as an Honest Scrap Award. I am supposed to name 5 things that make me happy and do one of them every day.

Okay, in no particular order they are:

• Read
• Write
• Talk to more than one of my 3 children
• Eat something chocolate

I would like to pass this Circle of Friends award on to Linda at Bar Mitzvahzilla. She is also more of a recent find, yet I feel like I've known her all my life. Her writing is clever, generous and lots of fun. Go visit and you'll see what I mean.

 

 

I have just one last shout-out, and that's to Geri over at FaboverFifty who recently very generously named IslandRoar one of her fave blogs. Geri's blog celebrates the middle-aged woman, but she's really talking about every woman I know. I stop in frequently for a dose of empowerment.

 

If you're still with me by now, all I can say is thanks, you're the best! I'll be back soon.

 

Spring Break Unplugged

Daughter #2's Spring Break is next week and the two of us are going to visit my parents in Florida.

Where, in their case, the year might just as well still be 1994 when it comes to technological advancement.

I'm serious. There is no DVR, no digital camera. Half the time their answering machine isn't even turned on. No Wi-Fi. No (gulp) internet access of ANY KIND.

And, dare I say it, there is No Computer. That's right. You heard me. No PC, no Mac.

Therefore, after a long and intense inner debate, I have decided to leave my laptop at home. Because really, what would be the point?

You know as well as I do that if I decide to bring it I'll spend hours roaming the streets in my rental car trying to "borrow" someone's Wi-Fi. Or I'll search for a library or Starbucks just to check my email.

Next thing you know I'll stop by Facebook. And let's face it, from there it's one split second click to your blogs. Daughter #2 will get cranky and impatient and make snide remarks. Then demand to use the computer when finally I am through.

It would not be pretty.

So.

The laptop will stay home.

I'm not sure whether to drape it in black as a sign of mourning, or to jump up and down with anticipated delight.

A whole week without a computer? Whatever shall I do? Read? Write? Lie in the sun and freckle? Do a psychosocial study on the daily habits of a certain retired couple who still insist on living in the dark ages?

The possibilities are endless.

Thus I beseech you, please excuse my absence from all your lovely blogs while I'm away. I'll be sure to stop by ASAP upon my return.

Okay? Are we good?

Great. Now I'm feeling really sad. What'll I do without you guys?

Just say a prayer for me that they still have electricity and running water, would you? I'm going to need all the help I can get.

 

Island Cowgirl?

I don't post on weekends as a general rule, but when one of my favorite bloggy buds, The South Dakota Cowgirl, asked me to do a guest-post while she was away this weekend, I said of course.

So come on over and leave me a comment. It'd make me really happy!

And thanks, Jen!

 

Spin Cycle: Blogging

I started blogging last May. Which I think, in this world, still qualifies me as somewhat of a beginner.

The biggest surprise to me about blogging, besides of course the gargantuan, never-before-imagined chunk of time it steals from the rest of your life, has been the wide range of people I've gotten to know, my bloggy friends if you will.

I remember when I was growing up and got to high school, how surprised I was to find I now had friends two or three years younger than me. Or older.

Before this, kids of every age in the neighborhood may have all played together, but in school your friends were generally found within your own grade. At least mine were.

Parenthood was another great friend equalizer. I had my kids a little on the young side compared with most of my friends, and I suddenly found myself in playgroups, Gymboree classes, and PTA meetings with people considerably older.

They were people whose opinions and ideas I highly valued, but had to admit would probably never have gotten to know if we didn't have kids the same age. Of course, as time went on, I started to become one of those older moms, and many of my newer mom-friends were younger than me.

Well, the blogging world has been like that for me, except times a hundred.

I tend to choose my favorite blogs based on the tone and quality of the writing. But I never would have thought in a million years I would so enjoy following blogs by women who still had small children or were enduring pregnancies. I was so done with all that.

I would have put money on the assumption that I wouldn't really get into blogs that centered on fashion or cooking. My biggest interests lay elsewhere.

But it soon became ironically clear that the people who would become my favorite bloggers could write about almost anything and I would read it.

Because they're clever, interesting, and fun. Whether they're wrangling horses or toddlers. Whether they're barely 30, well over 60, or my very own age.

Like most of you, I have bloggy buds from all across the country and many places around the globe. You know who you are. That's right, I'm looking at you.

Who knows how long I'll go on with IslandRoar. At least once a month I stop and consider whether or not I should quit.

But for right now I'm going to keep on keeping-on.

Because otherwise I'd just miss you all too damned much.

To read more on how bloggers feel about blogging, go visit Sprite's Keeper, a blogger extrordinaire. And let me give a shout out to Geri over at Fab over Fifty. She's featuring IslandRoar on her page of favorite blogs! Thanks Geri!

 

 

Introducing...My New Neighbor

 

While I recover from my surgery, I am delighted to host Kristen from Motherese today as my very first guest-poster ever, and part of the Won't You Be My Neighbor series at The Never-True Tales.

 

Kristen's blog was a rather recent find for me, but she very quickly became one of my favorites. A former teacher and the mother of two young sons, her writing is witty, intelligent, and straight from the heart. If you don't already know her, you should. Enjoy!

 

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When was the last time you received a letter in the mail? A good, old-fashioned, honest-to-goodness, hand-written letter? Not just a birthday card, with a short personal message scribbled on it. Or a "We need to catch up soon!" jotted at the bottom of a canned Christmas letter. A letter - on gossamer onion-skin stationery or heavy card-stock?

 

When was the last time you wrote one?

 

I just finished reading The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society, a lovely novel written almost entirely in letters. In the book, a young London author begins a correspondence with the eclectic and endearing members of a wartime book club on Guernsey, one of the islands in the English Channel. Over the course of writing to these men and women, Juliet comes to see these people she's never met as true friends - so much so that she turns inward to a degree, living through her wordy relationships rather than those with the people surrounding her.

 

And if you read their letters to her - and hers to them - you begin to understand why. Full of humor, insight, and compassion, the letters create a picture of life on Guernsey during the Second World War, a time during which books and conversation were the only creature comforts available to the occupied islanders.

 

In a letter to her editor when she finally makes her way to visit her friends on Guernsey, Juliet writes:

As the mail boat lurched into the harbor, I saw St. Peter Port rising up from the sea on terraces, with a church on the top like a cake decoration, and I realized that my heart was galloping. As much as I tried to persuade myself it was the thrill of the scenery, I knew better. All those people I've come to know and even love a little, waiting to see - me. And I, without any paper hide behind.

Reading these beautiful letters made me lament that we seem to have moved away from letter writing as a culture. We e-mail, we text, we tweet. We focus on efficiency rather than profundity. And how much less personal does a message seem when you can't feel the indentations in the paper from the pressure of the pen, can't see the smudges of the ink? Or when the author abbreviates her words? Are our words really worth so little that we can't take the time to spell them out? JMHO

 

But then, just as nostalgia for the days of pen and paper threatened to convert me to a complete Luddite, it occurred to me: I write letters everyday. I write about my feelings. I write about the people and events that matter to me. I think about the words I choose. I share pieces of myself.

 

I blog.

 

In a letter to Juliet, the Guernsey literary society's matriarch writes, "Excuse my unburdening myself. My worries travel about my head on their well-worn path, and it is a relief to put them on paper." This internalization of worry is a sensation that is familiar to me - as is the sweet satisfaction that comes from putting my thoughts down on screen.

 

Moreover, the community that I have found here in the blogosphere rivals the camaraderie of Juliet and her correspondents. About them and her experience in writing to them, Juliet notes:

The truth is, I am living more in Guernsey than I am in London at the moment - I pretend work with one ear cocked for the sound of the post dropping in the box, and when I hear it, I scramble down the stairs, breathless for the next piece of the story. This must be how people felt when they gathered around the publisher's door to seize the latest installment of David Copperfield as it came off the printing press.

Like Juliet and her letters, I look forward to the posts and comments of the men and women I have found online. I check my e-mail eager to read a comment from one of them. I open my Google Reader ready to devour one of their posts - one of their letters to me. My mind percolates with ideas for new posts of my own - my letters to them. Although I have only been blogging for a few months, I think of them as friends. They know me. I know them.

 

In the end, though, I am left wondering: if we spend too much time living in these virtureal communities (thanks to Aidan at Ivy League Insecurities for that great term) - in the words we exchange with these friends on paper or on-screen - are we missing out on the life happening around us?

 

Juliet wonders too:

[I]n these past two or three years, I have become better at writing than living...On the page, I'm perfectly charming, but that's just a trick I learned. It has nothing to do with me. At least, that's what I was thinking as the mail boat came toward the pier.

Writing letters - or blog posts - may be a salve for the growing trend toward impersonality in our communication, but can writing ever replace the intimacy and immediacy of an in-person encounter? By elevating blogging in this way, am I just trying to justify my focus on a screen rather than on the people and events around me?
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Thank you, Maureen, for the opportunity to post here today. I am grateful for the chance to expand my community of pen pals. I hope your readers will consider reading some more of my letters at Motherese and sending me some of their own.

 

IslandRoar community, what do you think? Are blogs the letters of the 21st century? Does our dedication to our online community threaten our relationships with our real-time one?

 

Blog Roll Please...

One of my very fine bloggy buds recently pointed out to me that her blog was not listed in my blog roll.

She wasn't complaining, mind you. But she wanted me to get on it. Right away.

Which brought to my attention that I had not updated my blog roll in a mighty long time. I read a lot more great blogs these days, and have developed some wonderful relationships.

So last weekend I tried to go through my reader and bring some order to my  blog roll. There is no doubt in my  mind that I will have screwed up and omitted someone , so if you don't see your blog there, and you think it should be, please let me know.

I'm aware a whole bunch of you couldn't care less, but lots of you do, and with good reason. One of the best ways I've found to discover new blogs has been through your recommendations and your blog rolls.

And I know that the first time I saw my blog listed in someone's blog roll, I definitely felt a little thrill. Yes, I'm that simple.

So I thank that blogging friend for the kick in the butt. Now if only she could help me get the rest of my life in order so easily...

 

Winter Wonderland?

I have determined that I'm not a cold weather vacation sort of gal.

It's something I've always suspected but I can now say, unequivocally, that it's a fact.

Last week we ventured into the mountainous New Hampshire wilderness for a family vacation. The fact that my kids now have three different winter breaks propelled me into scheduling a mini-vacation at a time convenient for all.

Reckless fool that I am, it didn't seem worth it booking a flight to some place warm for a mere four days. Ah, the wisdom of hindsight.

Instead, I chose an historic resort in New Hampshire. The place was beautiful. The skiing was right down the road, in addition to tubing, zip-lining, horse-drawn sleigh rides, and dog-sledding (yes, dog-sledding!).

These all seemed like fun-filled and perfectly reasonable activities at the time. And they were, they really were.

Except.

The east coast had that post-Christmas cold snap. Temps shot down to single digits, negative five with the wind chill during the day. It never stopped snowing, heavy at times, but, up until the morning of our departure, there was an endless cascade of flakes. Beautiful to look at. At least for the first day. Or two.

Remember when your kids were little and you spent all that time bundling them up to play in the snow? Extra socks and mittens. Hats and snow pants. Boots and scarves. And then of course, they'd have to pee, a truly monumental endeavor at that point.

Well, that's how I felt the whole time I was there. Bundle up to brave the great outdoors, peel off the layers once back inside. Bundle up. Peel off. A never-ending array of damp clothing and snow streaked floors.

Static electricity on the clothes, in the hair. Dry skin. Hat head. Numb faces and runny, red noses.

Don't get me wrong; we had fun. Tubing was fun. And zip-lining over a ski slope. I've always enjoyed speed.

And there was laughter, at times hysterical. Especially on our horse-drawn sleigh ride in blizzard-like conditions, an experience none of us will soon forget, including Dave, our driver, or Glenn, his trusty draft horse.

"I'm cold, Mommy. I'm cold." This, from my 22 year-old son, curled in the fetal position on his bed after skiing.

Shut up and grow a pair, I wanted to snap at him. Except that I was too busy counting my own frozen digits.

Okay, we admit it. We're wimps.

We tried our best. We persevered. We can check one off the bucket-list.

"The next time we take a sleigh ride, it won't be in a blizzard," First-Born Son informed me.

"What next time?" I stared at him. "I don't know about you, but I'm good. For life."

And while nothing beats sipping a hot-toddy by the warmth of a roaring fire as the winds howl at the windows, I think I prefer a tropical drink with a tiny umbrella in it, while lounging poolside or on some warm, white sand.

Promise me you'll remind me of this next winter, okay?

 

I Want to be Tone Deaf

Today I am guest posting for Jen over at Sprite's Keeper.

I can't tell you how thrilled and honored I was when she asked me to do this. Jen was one of the early commenters back when I started this blog last May. I enjoy everything she writes.

My guest-post is about the lovely way my young-adult children talk to me. You know, that special, heartwarming tone that teenagers save just for their parents?

So click on over and leave me a comment. Please. I need to know somebody cares...

 

Spin Cycle: Cyber Santa

Jen of Sprite's Keeper very generously took the time to organize this Secret Cyber Santa Spin (say THAT five times fast). From a list of our favorite bloggers, she waved her magic wand and assigned us one lovely blogger on whom we were to post.

I get to rave about The South Dakota Cowgirl, Jen, one of my all time most fascinating bloggy buds.

I was first attracted to Jen's blog because her world is so completely different than my own. Originally from Texas, she rides horses in barrel events and lives on a huge cattle ranch in South Dakota.

Her days are filled with riding and training horses and helping her cowboy, Zach, with multiple ranch related activities, from herding and preg-checking cattle to rescuing horses stuck on wire fences.

It's clear from her posts that she's an awesome cook, but her creativity doesn't end there. Among her many talents, she makes gorgeous jewelry, plays piano and guitar, sings, and even writes her own songs. Her voice is lovely and definitely worth a listen.

I can't imagine what it's like to live on acres and acres populated with deer, antelope, rattlesnakes, jackrabbits and prairie dogs, but Jen's spectacular photographs and video give me some idea.

I may have originally followed SDCG out of curiosity, but I've stayed because of the sincere and generous person she is.

Like all of us, Jen has been through a lot, and I don't mean just upending her life in Texas to move to South Dakota. Her heartfelt writing reveals a woman who is courageous and adventurous, playful and stubborn, and very much devoted to her friends and family.

If you don't already follow SDCG, you should make a point to click on over there and take a look around.

One thing I didn't plan on when I started this whole blogging thing last May, was the extent to which I would develop actual relationships, however virtual, with fellow bloggers. Jen may be much younger than I, and our lives as different as night and day, but through her words I sense a kindred spirit.

She has been a fun and loyal cyber friend, and I truly hope she goes on sharing her world with us for a long, long time.

Jen may not know this, but it's entirely possible one day I just might show up at her door, ask her to throw me on a horse, and have her give me a personal tour of the ranch. I get the feeling we'll have a lot to talk about.

For more Cyber Santa Spins, go call on Sprite's Keeper. And give her a big holiday hug from me.

 

More Bloggy Bling

 

A new bloggy pal of mine over at Gone Bananas was kind enough to bestow this award on me, or, as she so cleverly put it, Bloggy Bling. Her blog is lots of fun, and it doesn't hurt that she posts great photos of her cute-as-a-button daughter.

Before I pass it on, I am supposed to list 7 traits about myself. Aw, hell. I'll try 5:

-I'm artistic. I hope that doesn't sound like bragging; it's just the way my brain works.

-I'm competitive. Not in a bad way, but if you're going to do something you might as well do it right.

-I'm loyal.

-I'm fierce. Don't mess with me when it comes to my family or a cause I believe in.

-I'm optimistic. I'm good at finding that silver lining. Life's a lot less draining that way.

 

I'd like to pass this award on to the following blogs. Whether they make me laugh or reach for the tissues, they're always a good read:

1) SuziCate at The Water Witch's Daughter: She tells a great story. She was kind enough to give me an award a few weeks ago and I'm happy to say Right back at you!

2) Jen at Jen on the Edge: Her thoughts on motherhood and chocolate make me think we're kindred spirits.

3) Casey at Half As Good As You: For me, she is the ultimate definition of "LOL."

Whether you already know these rockin' bloggers or not, go show them some bloggy love. That's what it's all about, no?

 

 

A Little Sugar...

 

The South Dakota Cowgirl honored me with this blog award recently. If you don't know her, you definitely should. She lives on a huge ranch with her guy Zach, some cattle, and some of the prettiest horses I've ever seen. Her posts are fun and thoughtful, and I make sure to check in with her every day.

Before passing this award along, I''m supposed to share up to 10 fascinating things about myself. Which is pretty hard, because I think you all probably know everything there is to know about me already. Let's see...

-For a short time, around age 8, I wanted to be a nun (yeah, I know; tell me about it). My parents wisely humored me until the inclination passed.

-A couple of years ago I dated a guy, for over a year, who had no sense of smell (are you thinking Blog Post, because I certainly am).

-I have the tiniest wrists I've ever seen in an adult. Really, I'm 5'9" and I have these wrists smaller than most infants. I love bracelets, but finding ones small enough is a challenge.

-I've always been able to do a back-bend, and now that I'm fast approaching old age, I make sure to do one once a year, just to prove I still can. 

-I love long dangly earrings. Although again, as I get older, I have to choose ones that are more lightweight so my earlobes don't end up on my shoulders.

-At family gatherings when I was a kid, my parents had me do impressions for entertainment; I did a great Ed Sullivan and Richard Nixon (who didn't?), as well as two of Lily Tomlin's characters: her telephone operator ("One ringie-dingie"), and Edith Anne.

-I love my feet. Of course it's just my opinion, but I think they're really pretty.

-I had a dream when I was pregnant with all three of my kids that correctly predicted what sex they would be.

 

Okay that's only eight, but I think we can agree it's more than enough. I'd like to pass this award on to the following blogs:

1) Erin at The Locals Love It: She has some great posts about cool places by people who actually live there, as well as useful travel tips and her own very thoughtful reflections on life in general.

2) Lynn at For Love or Funny: She never fails to make me smile.

3) Jill at Stella's Roar: I've been following her for a while now, and she always posts photos of the most beautiful and interesting things, leaving me in a constant state of yearning.

Please take some time and go visit these lovely ladies. You'll be really glad you did.

I hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving! I am going to take the next few days off and be back on Monday.

 

 

Best Blog Award

 

SuziCate, a new bloggy friend of mine from over at The Water Witch's Daughter gave me this nifty award. If you don't know her blog you should definitely check it out. I find her observations and reflections on life straightforward and delightful.

The only rule is to pass it along to up to 5 bloggers. So here goes:

1) A Widow for One Year: I've been following her blog for a couple of months now. She's an awesome writer who has made me both laugh and cry on several occasions. 

2) Lynn at Allegria Images: She's in the process of taking and posting a photo a day for the next year, and she's quite entertaining along the way.

3) Deb at Menopausal New Mom: A very recent and fun discovery for me. The title of her blog in itself intrigued the heck out of me, and I'm really enjoying her writing.

Please check out these bloggers. Now would be a really good time.

 

 

Blog Award

A blogger I am very fond of, Jane, over at Theycallmejane's Blog, was kind enough to bestow this award on me a couple of weeks ago. Jane's blog is clever and honest, and I make sure to check in there every day.

Before passing this award on, I am supposed to share 7 random things about myself. I am so bad at this but here goes:

-I always wanted to be an actress. I have a secret hankering for the stage and plan on getting back to community theater when Daughter #2 goes off to college (I know, I've said that one before; I told you I was bad at this).

-In 5th grade I brought a baby picture of me to school and told everyone I had a baby sister. Wishful thinking I guess. I probably also wanted to see how many people I could get to believe me. I confessed the truth only days later.

-I wrote my first complete novel when I was 11 (and no, it's not available at Barnes & Noble).

-I am addicted to the TV shows Lost and Friday Night Lights. Okay, and America's Next Top Model, but that is secret info that is not to be shared beyond this page.

-One of my dreams is to go live in Ireland for at least 6 months one day and work on a novel.

That's it. Only 5, I know. Just deal with it.

 

The 3 bloggers I would like to pass this award on to are:

-Mama Badger over at out of the boondocks and into the burbs... : Been following her blog for a while now. She never fails to make me smile.

-Ocean Girl at Live High: A fairly new discovery. Her world couldn't be more different than mine, and I am intrigued by everything she has to say.

-Heather at Welch Happenings: Also a new discovery. She has a friendly, open style of writing that always leaves me feeling like we've just sat down together for a cup of coffee.

Okay. Now go check out these women, and say hi from me.

 

Take a Tour of the Vineyard

 

Today I'm posting over at The Locals Love It. It's a new site started by King's Mom. People write about the places where they live and why they like living there.

This was a no-brainer for me. You all know how completely in love I am with this amazing island, even with its gray winters and endless March winds.

King's Mom has some fun features on the site, like Friday's Top 5 , and she provides lots of cool links for traveling anywhere.

So please go over there and check it out. And don't forget to read my post on the Vineyard while you're there

 

 

I'm Fabulous!

 

My friend over at F8HASIt recently bestowed this award on me. I read her blog every day, enjoying her cleverly written thoughts and observations. She makes me feel sane.

She wrote she wishes "we were sisters from different mothers," which I consider a great compliment. And who knows? Stranger things have happened.

I am supposed to reveal five obsessions I have and pass this award on to five other worthy bloggers.

The blogger part is easy; I read so many wonderful blogs. These five are some of the ones I make sure to check out every day. I enjoy everything they post.

-...A Mom on Spin: she blogs about her adventures working in a rectory and raising three teen daughters. She is absolutely hysterical.

-Privilege: writes about fashion, career, and life, all from the point of view of the High WASP, in a cool, sophisticated manner, sprinkled throughout with warmth and humor.

-Gloria's Spanish View: this is a newer blog whose author upended her life and moved to Spain. She's got fascinating stories and amazing photos to share.

-Life and Times of a Wicked Step Mom: this blogger is stepmom to 3 daughters. Her tales of life show both the frustrating and poignant moments.

-only a movie: I just discovered this blogger recently. Her words are honest and funny, and she is a fellow New Englander to boot.

Now for the harder part. I'd like to claim I'm not obsessive about anything, but who am I kidding?

1-My writing: this has been my life's passion since I was eight. Can't add anything to that.

2-Gardening: I need to have flowers blooming spring through fall. This summer I was so busy working (and blogging) that I slacked off, which makes me feel guilty, which proves my obsession.

3-Taking photos: I'm not sure why. Maybe some part of me feels that if there's no picture of it, it didn't happen. I actually went and bought a new camera two weeks ago when my very good one suddenly died and I had to bring it in to be fixed. Daughter #1 was going off to school; I obviously had to have photos.

4-Shoes: enough said.

5-Daughter #2 says I should put "my kids," but even though that may be true, it doesn't mean I have to own up to it. 

The blogs I listed are so fabulous that at least a couple of them probably already have this award. But I wanted them to know, anyway, how very much I enjoy reading what they write.

Now you need to go check them out, even if you already know them.

Go on. I'm serious!

 

Spin Cycle

For this week's Spin we're supposed to re-run our least favorite post. I'm new at this, and I only have three month's  worth of posts, but I could have picked from a few. I chose this one because nobody commented on it. I think I may have come off as a prude. I almost hate to run it again, but here goes...

Read it quickly and then run on over to Sprite's Keeper and see what posts other people may not have wanted you to see again.

The "D" Word

Can someone please explain to me what the deal is with the sudden explosion of the word "douche" on family television? When did it go from the kind of word I wouldn't want to hear my kids use in the casual company of their friends, let alone in front of adults, to being bandied about on the likes of "Scrubs," "How I Met Your Mother," "90210," "Parks and Recreation," "Lost," and "Greek," just to name several of the ones I've actually witnessed over the past few months alone (can you tell I'm watching TV with adolescent girls?)?

I don't know about you, but when I was young, back in the dark ages when we actually had to get up to change the channel, "douche" and "douche bag" were shocking, soap-in-the-mouth inducing No-No's.

But then, other words were loaded back in the day as well. In seventh grade Angie Beals was suspended from our middle school field hockey team because the coach heard her utter the fateful words, "Hackensack sucks." And when I told my mother what had happened, she self righteously snapped, "Serves her right."

For me it was a lesson well learned. To this day I cringe at the uber-casual way adults and kids alike sling the word "sucks" around. Not that I don't occasionally use it myself, but not before carefully glancing around to make sure no one over the age of 65 is close enough to hear me.

I have a friend, just over 60, who does not approve of the expression "to blow something or someone off." I suppose for him it conjures up a tawdry description of vague and illicit sexual innuendo from his youth. But I use it quite complacently, as in, "You better not blow me off (by not showing up to my party, for example)," or "Come on, blow off work and let's go to the beach," without blinking an eye.

So is the shock value of words guaranteed to fade slowly as one generation ages and another pops up to take its place? Is it a foregone conclusion that one day my (as yet unborn) grandchildren may jump off their teeter-totter and run to greet me exclaiming, "Grandma, we're so F___ing glad to see you; we missed you so F___ing much!"

And I will disapprovingly glare at their parents, my children, who will of course merely laugh and say, "Oh Mom, you're soo old fashioned. Don't be such a douche."

I hope not. But you never know. Because the last thing I expected to see last month, when Daughter #2 and I went to the movies, was baby-blue-eyed, teen heart throb Zach Efron calling another character a "douche bag" in the recently released film "17 Again."

Am I the only one? What words are deal breakers for you? I'd really like to know. So please, leave a comment. I'd really rather you didn't blow me off.

Birthing My Blog

I'm starting to think that my decision to start a blog was a bit like deciding to have a baby. Do you know what I mean?

I was so excited to have a baby. I prepared for it. I thought I was ready. Really ready.

Then I had the baby. And he was there. All the time. Whether I felt like being a mommy or not. All the time.

Don't get me wrong. I loved my baby. And  I would make that same decision every time. But you know, some days, you just don't feel like being a mother. You're all mothered out. Yet you have to mother anyway.

I'm really enjoying my blog. A lot. It's keeping me writing every day, which was a major purpose in starting it. I've met some lovely people and I'm reading a lot of excellent writing.

And I think this whole overwhelmed, "What have I done," feeling is no doubt typical for being three months into this adventure. At any rate, it's helping me prioritize. Because I'd rather feel as though having a blog was more like getting a puppy rather than having a baby.

After all, a puppy is a big commitment. It requires lots of care and attention. But it doesn't take over your life the way a baby does. And it grows up much more quickly. Some days you can practically ignore it, so long as it's fed.

And, most importantly, you can put it in it's lovely little crate or yard when you leave, and go on about your life without feeling guilty. Try doing that with a kid (seriously, try it. It doesn't work. I know this for a fact).

Have any of you ever felt like this about your blogs, maybe back in the day when you were first starting out? Or am I the only one? Go on, tell me. I can take it. Just be gentle. Remember, I'm a new mom.

Award Time

Love My Friends Award

 

I received this award from my pal Joanie over at Joanie's Random Ramblings, and I was really touched. She's been a bright spot for me since I started this blog, and I am happy to "pass on the Love."

The Love My Friends Award is given to those bloggers who aspire, inspire and share the most beautiful of human attributes: art, wisdom and friendship. Deliver this award to eight bloggers who must choose eight more.

It's a little tricky to define a "friend" in the blogosphere, sort of like the way my kids define their "friends" on Facebook. But for the list below, I went with people whose blogs I really enjoy checking in on as much as possible, and with whom I have exchanged thoughtful and genuine emails with as part of the whole "comment" process.

Getting to know these bloggers has made me really glad I started this whole thing.

    1-Juggling Life
    2-Sprite's Keeper
    3-Forever A Jersey Girl
    4-One of Life's Little Twists
    5-Pseudonymous High School Teacher
    6-Voted Off the Island
    7-f8hasit
    8-Jan's Sushi Bar

I realize some of them may already have received this award, or they might be too busy to deal with passing it on right now, both of which are fine. But I really wanted them to know I think they rock! Go see for yourselves.

Honest Scrap Award

I was truly flattered this week to receive awards from two bloggers that are very near and dear to my heart. I've only been blogging for about two months, but these two women have been wonderfully supportive, pretty much from the start. So thank you, thank you, thank you to -Privilege and Joanie's Random Ramblings.

I'm going to pass on the first award, from -Privilege,  this week and the one from Joanie next week, just to break things up a little bit, and give me a chance to decide which of the many amazing blogs I read to bestow these on.

-Privilege says she feels I write posts that are personally meaningful. I find that to be a great compliment, and I hope it's true.

The rules, or as -Privilege calls them, the requests, for this award are as follows:
  
     -Each blogger to whom the award is given must post these requests.
     -Each blogger to whom the award is given must list 10 random things
      about themselves and pass the award on to other recipients.
     -The award recipients then need to do the same.
     -Don't forget to leave a comment telling the recipient about the award.

I'm not very good with the random tidbits, but I've managed to come up with these:

    1-I have two completed novels I hope to publish one day. One is a
       kid's middle-reader novel, and the other a woman's novel.
    2-I am a crazy-ass swimmer; I go into withdrawal when I can't swim in
       the winter. I actually dream about swimming when I can't do it.
    3-One of my life-goals is to learn to fly a small plane.
    4-I have always loved to act in plays, and hope to go back to  doing
       this once Daughter #2 goes off to college.
    5-I discovered I was a writer at age eight and have never looked back.
    6-I have a secret passion for drawing and painting. I haven't had time
       in years, but a colleague of my Ex's once commissioned me to draw
       their child's portrait.
  
Now I'd like to pass this award along to five blogs that I love. Whether they inspire me or make me laugh, they always keep me coming back for more.

    -i could cry but i don't have time
    -The Coconut Diaries
    -Midlife Musings
    -Sally's World
    -sassy two socks

If you haven't already, check these out. You'll love them!